The more time goes by since I became a mommie, the more I notice things that signify my growning up. For instance, I used to drink, smoke and have other poor habits. I haven't had a cigarette in 2yrs/8mo. I have been drunk, at most...5 times, and that's REALLY PUSHIN' IT! (Just the thought of being hungover TERRIFIES me!)
At some point in life (circa 2004) I became extremely destructive (any prior behavior was with the intention of good times) and would drink myself so far into intoxication, it was amazing the real me ever found its way back. I didn't have a 'drinkng problem', I had a 'coping problem' and lacked any real sign of self-control. Having been through some traumatizing events in my teen years, being your typical insecure young woman, along with a 4yr emotionally abusive relationship, and losing my grandpa (my hero)...saying I had issues would be an understatement.
The best thing that EVER happened to me (aside from anything after this monumental occassion) was getting a DUI. Spending 8hrs alone in a holding cell, and going to the bathroom on camera were more than enough for me. Long story short, I met Stephen and we had AJ LOL
The whole point of this is I have given up any 'bad habits'. All the methods I used to cope with stress, sadness, anger and even happiness in some cases. As a result, I'm uptight and irritable. I'm still trying to find my outlet...until then, I'll keep suckin' it up and puttin' a smile on my face.
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